I Found A Museum Quality Bookstore Virgin!!!

So now that I have been hooked on these new things to me refered to as "Books" I had to run to Barnes and Noble to get the sequals to my favs. No I'm not getting a Bookfondle techie book reader as I know and have said before they will take all human knowledge and turn against us. So taking the kids to the store is sucktastic but needs to be done. We get to the store and its pooring buckets and my youngest minion walks like a penguin so entering the store I look like I'm a late entry for a wet tshirt contest. I am frantically searching for the Hunger Games books and my kids are like Feral Dogs just wild and of course molesting all the books. So we head back to the kid area for some containment and then I see HIM!!! I am not shitting you when I see White Urkel!!!! This guy who obviously is working his dream job asks if I need help. He had round coke bottle sized glasses very Harry Potter like but not the hot way. He looked mid 30's and had stringy hair pulled back into a tiny pony tail with a little whispy hanging down to add to the awesomeness! I am sure he thought I wasn't running on all four cylinders because I was just staring at him as if I was being Punk'd!!! I had grabbed 2 Chelsea Handler books and Bookstore Virgin then says "OH you are looking at Biographies," then proceeds to tell me he has just read the most amazing biography about a man who can only communicate through blinking. He starts chattin about it and this is where I want to use his pony tail like reigns and say "whoa little book worm mamma gots ta go!" Duuuuuude my kids are running around with Megaphone style loudness, I have 2 books about an alcoholic comidian and her onenight stands Yes please I want to know more through your amazing nerdness!!!! Yes grab me Blinking Mans biography and that Presidential biography on Andrew Jackson too!!! So he finishes his blabbing and I say "Can you be a peach and get me the last 2 Hunger Games books?" He flits off and gets me the books but Oh No he tries to sell me on the Nook!!!!!! I just put my hand up and mutter something about robots and world domination but thanks for your help I say!!! Ughh we finally get out of there but yes I have spotted a museum quality bookstore Virgin!!!!! Grab a StarB's and go check him out he is very chatty!!!!!